"To thine own self be true" - a lesson in comparing yourself to others

I hope everyone is having a great weigh-in result this week.  For me, I've hit a milestone, losing 1.8kg.  It's my highest weekly loss ever and now takes me to the lightest weight I've been since I was 18 years of age.  It brings me to a 32kg loss from my heaviest weight and 14.7kg total since starting 12WBT.  Sometimes I find it hard to believe. 

I'll admit, its great to have a big loss on the scales and do happy claps, high-fives, air-punches and joy jumps.  But here's my weight loss reality.....most weeks I average a loss of only 800gms and sometimes its as low as 200gms.  However, in each 12WBT round I consistently lose weight. There are times, as I'm sure there will be for you over the coming weeks, when its very hard to have a loss of only 500gms, for example, when you are seeing other people post big losses of 2kgs or more. 

When the small losses happen, the bad fairy / Darth Vader voice in my head inevitably pops up and says things like "you are failing, you'll never get there, what's the point?" or "come to the dark side and console yourself with a blueberry muffin and cappuccino but make it skim milk so you can appease the guilt from the muffin.  Go on, you've been good all week, it won't hurt."

So before I go to that dark place, I remind myself of this; before starting Round 3 in 2011 (my first round), I had been trying to lose weight for some time. I was already eating fairly healthy and exercising daily but there was plenty of room for improvement and a massive plateau to break through.

Other people who started at the same time as me had diets, exercise patterns, ages, genders, and the amount of weight they were carrying that were vastly different to mine. In other words, although we were all doing the 12WBT plan, we had all started from different places. This is why its so important not to compare yourself to others.  Chances are you didn't start at exactly the same point.

I have since found a 12WBT twin, the wonderful Erica, whose journey, weight loss, issues and frustrations are spookily similar to my own.  We often do the same things each week (often at the same time!) or burn the same calories, but our results still vary. 

For me, having tried to lose weight for so long now, I know that I have a pattern of losing weight; over 4 weeks, I have 1 big loss week, followed by 2 weeks of average losses and a 4th week of a small loss and then the pattern repeats. My body ajdusts for hormones and recalibrating the weight it has lost.  

Very rarely is the path to success a straight line for me but as long as my weight is following a downward trend, I am happy.

Even though I know my patterns, when I lose less than 500gms, I review the week to see what I could have done differently.  Sometimes I accept that it is what it is and I simply need to persist.  Other times I need to adjust my exercise intensity, or the times that I eat, or just slap myself stupid for not controlling my snacking habit.

And that's the point.... it's about my journey and how I am going to manage my health for the rest of my life.  No one can do that for me except me.  My photos show me at my starting point and various weight milestones along the way that remind me of how far I've come and how far I have yet to go.

It's worth remembering too that in 12 weeks time you will be comparing yourself with YOUR before and after shots.  Not mine, not someone else's. If you follow exactly what Michelle says, you will be amazed at the changes. 

The road to great health is different for everyone.  Some people take the freeway and others, like me, take the scenic route because I have a lifetime of weight to shift,  habits and thinking to change, and so much to learn to make sure the rest of my life is not like the first half.

I don't try to do big spectacular weight loss feats anymore.  I find small, daily changes in my habits are the key to success.  Small weight losses can add up to a big change. I focus on being persistent, consistent, and running my own race.  One meal at a time, one exercise at a time, one day at a time and I am getting there. You can do it too. It only requires that you be true to yourself.

I eat healthy and I exercise, so why am I not losing weight? What the Apollo 13 mission taught me

How much do we all love a weight-loss success story?  To read about or watch ordinary, everyday people conquering a goal that is so common to all of us – losing weight – by changing their lives and the way they look is inspiring.  I know I look and think, “I want that for myself.  Maybe I can do it.”

A successful magazine or TV story is one of great contrasts; a makeover consisting of a dramatic before and after.  And it’s not just the pictures; it’s the accompanying story as well.  But too often I read of people with a fast food, 3 litres of cola or block of chocolate a day habit with a preference for being a couch potato and surmise that it’s no wonder they lost weight if they simply ate a diet based on sound nutritional guidelines and got off their butt.  That’s not diminishing their achievement in any way; it’s just acknowledging the answer to their problem was common sense.

And yet there are so many people out there, like me, who consider their diet to be pretty good or healthy and do get regular exercise but still carry excess kilos they frustratingly can’t lose. 

In the information age, we are bombarded with news about what to eat and how to look.  This month, I don’t think there was a single magazine cover aimed at women in Australia that didn’t feature a bikini shot of a celebrity showing the good, the bad and the ugly with a feature story on a diet.  Armed with an excess of ‘scientific’ information and having done so many diets in the past, I’ve got a fairly good idea what I should be eating and try to do so.  I can put my hand up to eating fresh fruit and vegetables each day.  I rarely drink alcohol, don’t like pizza or fast food, and I love grilled fish and vegetables.

Then there is the question of exercise.  I have two beagles that insist on at least an hour’s walk every day – rain, hail or shine.  I like getting out in the fresh air and sunshine.  I exercise.

So the question I grappled with earlier in my weight loss journey was this; “if I’m eating healthy and I exercise every day, why am I not losing weight?”

I have to say, it took me a long time and an ocean of frustration to figure it out.  It was in the process of losing my second 15 kilos that I finally did.  At my heaviest, I needed to lose 35 – 40% of my body weight to be within a healthy weight range or BMI of 20 -25.   As I started to lose weight I realised that the answer lay not in extremes but in the number 40 or 40% to be exact or whatever percentage I was overweight at the time.

The portion size of the healthy food I was eating was about 40% more than it should have been.   If it wasn’t portion sizes, it was the hidden extras like avocado and cheese in a roast beef sandwich that added 40% more calories than I needed.  On the days, where I was strict with my three main meals, my snacks would derail me.  To be honest, they still can (it’s a work in progress for me).  I have never eaten a packet of biscuits in one hit and, this may sound like sacrilege, but I don’t like Tim Tams – of any variety. 

I have restricted my beverages to 1 great coffee a day and 1 to 2 cups of tea but by the time I added 1 or 2 biscuits to each of these drinks, my calorie intake was through the roof or 40% over my allowance.  And that was before I had yoghurt or a paddle pop for dessert at night or ditched the biscuits and had a blueberry muffin with my morning coffee.  I mean, surely the blueberries made it healthy and if my skinny friends were eating it each day, it couldn’t be that bad, could it?

My exercise was 40% less effective than it needed to be too. Yes I walked the dogs every day and when our beagles get the scent of a rabbit, they can run with speed like a greyhound but as they have aged, they have got slower.  Although we could walk for over an hour, I was barely breaking a sweat or getting puffed. I needed to do 40% more.

My inspiration came in the form of the Apollo 13 mission. You know the moon mission where things go horribly wrong and astronaut Jim Lovell says,“Houston. We have a problem.”? It’s a massive understatement of the situation at hand and the realisation there is no quick fix. I could relate to that. The Apollo 13 solution lay in first stating a goal that ‘Failure is not an option’ (another famous quote from the mission). It required systematically working through every possible option, going through a series of diagnostics to rule out and rule in possibilities, marshalling all resources available and finding and trying a series of small solutions that ultimately got the mission home safely. Having visited Kennedy Space Centre in Florida a number of times, I also know that everyone on the Apollo 13 mission team exercised personal leadership and responsibility while working for the good of the team.

On my journey to reach my goal weight I have had to own and acknowledge I have a serious problem.  I have also resolved that failure is simply not an option.  And in finding my solution, it took me a while to find Michelle Bridges’ 12WBT that would get me home to the place where I could live my best life.  I take responsibility for my actions and have, and continue to work through solutions.  I have trust and belief I can lose weight because I know Michelle has the formula right.  It’s hard to put into words the relief I feel to have found something that works and can get me all the way to where I need to be.  I can’t say it is always easy but I have the tremendous gift of the 12WBT family that pulls together like no other team I’ve ever known. 

To reach my destination, I have to keep making a series of percentage changes.  This round, with just over 15% left to lose, my eating and snacking needs to be 15% better than it currently is.  My training needs to be 15% more consistent and effective than it is.  My mindset needs to be 15% stronger. There are other things too.  If Michelle were to ask me how I’m doing today, I’d probably say about 85%; there is room for improvement.

That said, looking for 15% is like trying to find money in a budget that is already stretched.  ‘Nickel and diming’ as my American friends call it, can feel like stinginess and a step too far.  There are tough choices to be made.  Sacrifices to endure.  And there is the joy that I am so very, very close to where I want to be. 

Champions, like astronauts, are prepared to go that extra mile, find that little bit more, and dig deep mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually.  I am no longer weak and broken.  I am a champion in the making.  I can do it.